Diary of a ghost

[Admin]

I can't stand romanceual spam, totally despise it

I can't stand, repeat, I can't stand 'romanceual spam'...I hate, would destroy in real life if ever met, anyone on this earth who actually thinks I have a dirty enough mind to

1. Hurt another in any way shape or form

2. To use another for 's_x'

3. To allow self to be used for same reason.

Romance is not a recreational thing to me, I don't play with others like they're toys.

And I hate it, repeat, hate it, when receive romanceual spam from fake profiles of fake women pretending to know and like you.

As if I'm dumb like others.

I take relationships seriously, and is probably why still unattached.

Sure, I get lonely, and sure, in private, from time to time indulge that loneliness (who doesn't), but that's between me and me.

But when it comes to dealing with real life people, humans, I only want real sentiment, not fake crap.

It's usually married types, who take love and affection for granted, it's usually them who seek all that fake crap on the side.

But me, no....either be real or get lost, when it comes to 'romance'...

And don't talk dirty to me in my emails, that crap totally turns me off, regardless of gender, it's a gigantic turn off to me!!

And gross!!

If you know me, think you know me, you'd talk about 'Math' instead, or 'History', or 'Aviation', or something logical.

But come at me with sleaze, and I don't know you.

[Admin]

I mean I spend all my life being publicly decent, perfect citizen, perfect civic record, never do anything wrong, and for slime bags to come at me as if I'm just some ordinary type off the streets...

All I can say is face me and see who's ordinary....

[Admin]

It's precisely why most do not face me, cause they don't want to be wrong, they'd rather be wrong, and believe they're right, than to be wrong and corrected.

[Admin]

Easier to 'whisper' and create, concoct all sorts of rumors, than to simply say 'hi' and discover for 'yourself'.

[Admin]

Time to 'Gut' place

I'm going to spend the next few months 'gutting' place, that is just getting rid of everything, forget about trying to 'sell stuff', like originally planned on doing, just takes to long.

The collective change I'd make from selling stuff, this item here, that item there, just isn't worth the time or hassle to me, unless maybe unemployed and selling used items was sole income.

Over the next few weeks I plan on getting rid of couch, which is junk now, box store sectionals look good new, but break down fast after a few years.

I want whole living room to be as empty and bare as I can get it, like when first moved in...cause that will symbolize a 'new start' from me.

And then want to replace old furniture with newer, lighter, more mobile furniture, or even 'outside furniture', for the inside.

But here's kind of what I had in mind.



Yes, I want that 'light', in and out, Office furniture feel to place, and this is near perfect for what I have in mind, tile floors with a couch set like this.

1. Easy to clean under
2. Easy to movie

I want my place, going forward, to have that 'we can leave in days' type of look to it, going forward I just don't want to be bogged down by 'stuff' ever again.

(Many people, as they age, get to this point in life, not just me, even millionaires start selling homes, and properties as they begin to realize it 'stuff' just bogs you down and doesn't really add to your happiness after a while).

Either the above type 'set' (comes with two chairs also), or I'm thinking about getting a 'swing couch' for living room and kind of giving it that outside park look and feel.



Again, I want inside of place to just have a 'passing through' type of feel to it, a spring time, type of look.

I don't want that 'heavy furniture' look to it ever again...heavy furniture look means you're 'home'.
Heavy furniture look means that's your final destination, and where I stay now just isn't, or at least I don't want it to.

My final destination would be like some Ranch in the desert or Cabin in the woods, or Mansion somewhere, that's paid for, with no urban type neighbors within 80 miles...(I'm sure everyone dreams of that though).

Final destination place means place you own, and don't mind passing away in.

An apartment or rented house in city is not a final destination place to me, when you never know if your next neighbors will be from hell.

But ye, anyways, over next few weeks, when off work, I'll definitely be making some big changes to inside of place, cause I do plan on moving (been saying that for years, so we'll see), but gutting inside of place is next big step towards that, that way when time comes to move, I don't look at 'stuff' and get overwhelmed and put off for yet another year.

Note: Outside furniture 'inside', if you start hearing more people doing that never forget you heard it here first, as ideas on these blog forums often 'borrowed' by others but yet those 'others', never get credit to where they found idea from.

But that will catch on, these blog forums are the source of many trends over the years.

[Admin]

I don't waste my artistic talents on social media, cause why dump out all your thoughts on FB or Twitter, and not even know you're shadow banned?
What an insult, so once I started figuring out, hearing from others, that they do that, that was it for me.

I'll leave links on there, but that's it.

Years ago, before social media morphed into what it is today, I lived on twitter, back when could actually interact with real people with real accounts, back when anyone could find and follow you, back before all the artificial traffic controls were implemented.

Now it's hard to get followers and hard to find actual real live people to follow, now it's just celebrities, or 'brand name companies', or 'news shows'...that's it, and you're once again reduced to just being a 'fan' or 'viewer'.

All these social sites created for average people at first, it gave average non celebrity types a place to shine, but oh no, the freagin celebrites didn't like that, so they had to start oozing their way into social media and the rest is history.

Now if you're not a celebrity, who wants to follow you?...no one.

Or if you don't exploit yourself romanceually, who wants to follow you?....no one.

And twitter also deleted most of the accounts of the 'radical people', when they were the ones who made it fun.

People with radical views always spice sites up, but they're the ones twitter and youtube FB got rid of, now what fun are those places?

What fun is it knowing that if you share viewpoint another doesn't agree with you get shadow banned and they don't even have the courtesy to tell you.

Why?, so their numbers stay high, so advertisers see how many members they have, even if you are a muted member.

At least here, views are very low, but at least I know they're visible.

[Admin]

I come here when I want silence, like entering a large arena and just hearing the sound of wind or rain in the distance.
I've been off for a few days, didn't accomplish what I wanted, but do we ever?

So many things are foul to me in the media, people allowed to ramble on at like a grade school level.

Grown talk radio host men, conducting their radio shows as if aimed at grade school students.

The level of immaturity in society is shocking, yet these people looked at by their peers as being talented, ye right.

When there's no competition, anyone can seem talented.

Media just amplifies stupidity, people you'd normally not hear from piped right into the TV or radio or computer.

Amplified stupidity.

Things done just to get a reaction, a jarring reaction, it's what people in the media do, on both sides.

There's really only one side in the media, it's called 'ratings'.

Oh well, most of us just gotta get up and go to work, and make the most of our short time being alive before we return to nothing again.

[Admin]

Always in a bit of a stupor when making transition from being off to going back to work.
I really get nothing out of work anymore, nothing, I could retire now, never ever work again, and be just fine with it.
Of course I can't do that cause don't have enough saved up, but if I did, I'd stop working 'now', and keep busy doing other stuff.

I've stopped chasing money years ago, this idea that you can labor yourself to riches, what a pipe dream.
People jump at the chance for overtime or to work an extra day on their day off for a extra few bucks...why?

1 hundred, 200, 300 extra dollars in one pay cycle, so what.

To me if 2-3 hundred dollars matters to you during one pay cycle than living wrong.

Poverty always nipping at your heels is not a fun way to live, to always feel like you must go to work.

Anyways, just trying to burn off some mental energy before laying down again.

[Admin]

I have fallen into the trap of being content.

I guess being content is good, when very old, I guess, but when still have potential, not sure if being content is so good.

But fact is, at the moment, when home, I feel content, I mean I don't even bother looking at pay check anymore.

Not sure why people obsess over average pay checks.

If getting paid near the same for years, for a decade, how is watching or eagerly awaiting pay check every week constructive?
Maybe in 'sales' where your pay check fluctuates with performance.

Anyways, I'm content, when home I just sit and sleep, sit some more, clean, watch TV, clean, eat, sleep, and type.
I'm content, and I guess I should be happy, cause a lot of times in the past I haven't been, or have been 'agitated', and agitation forces you to change things in life, as in moving, or new job, or dietary habits.

Plus I've been drinking a bit again, and that'll definitely subdue your ambitions when off work and at home.

I should be happy that I'm able to live such a casual life at the moment cause things roll around in phases, calm followed by stress.

I just sit still and go no where, cause there's nothing out there for me anymore, even going to the store bores the hell out of me now, and haven't been to a Walmart in over a year.

I use to always go to Walmart, going to Walmart use to be an event, all the cheap stuff, now I can't get rid of all the stuff I have.

Was wasting over 1000 a year on storage for years, what a waste of money, and still trying to get rid of it, almost there.

Anyways, I'm content for now.

[Most don't caer]

Most people don't care about people like us, until we, you, us and I, do something wrong, then they all flock in, trying to make names for themselves, to interpit the situation for those of you out there these so called experts think are dumb.

Amazing how crooked life is, on all levels.