It's Sunday

[Admin]

It's Sunday



Today's a very easy day for me to start drinking again..

1. Don't feel so good, battling some kind of internal conflict with parasites, or at least that's my guess since see bit marks.
2. Over all, just don't feel so optimistic at the moment about anything.

And both are related, cause and effect I guess, either way it has effected my mood, and in the past alcohol would come rescue me right about now, cause as you know, at least drinkers, when drunk, or getting drunk, nothing matters!

When drunk, you could die in 5 minutes and would not care, would be laughing about it.

But I'm not dying in fast minutes, even though moral feels like it, so if I drank, won't fix a thing, and in fact will just feel even worse than I do now later tonight and into tomorrow during that whole post drunken recovery period.

At least this way, sober, even though I feel not so hot, at least I do have my wits about me (ye so what, like anyone cares or that matters)

Well it matters to me, just like no one cares when I'm feeling good, no one will care when I'm feeling bad, so what's the point?

I don't know.

I hope I can hold out...maybe I should stop even writing about it.

Anyways, it's Sunday, and I'm here....still.

[Admin]

It's Sunday and I'm going to drink today cause body feels like crap

I just don't feel like sitting around all day feeling like crap, body that is, so ye, I will drink, if only to num the crappy feeling for a while.

Right now I just don't care...I do everything right, and still, still, sht goes wrong, bug bites, this or that, it's always something.

It's like evil just never wants you to feel whole and well.

And now days, all the steps you got to go through just to see a gdm doctor, and when finally do, doctor more stupid than you are, yet now you've had to spend money just to see a doctor who's more stupid than you are.

I don't know what the solution is right now.

I never ever go to the doctor, but because most m/f's do, all the time and for nothing, the system is backed up and clogged, and so when a person like me, who only goes once a decade, needs to go, it's a nightmare cause the system is so clogged up with m/f's who go there just for a runny nose.

[Admin]

I notice that if I don't get dressed when I get up, I'll be lazy for most of the day.

But even though I'm off today, I notice that when I get dressed and groom as if going to work or going out, I tend to be more constructive throughout the day, since already dressed.

I mean getting dressed and groomed in and of itself is like a 30 minute activity that I don't really feel like doing unless have to.

On work days, there's lots of stuff I do that don't want to.

I'm off today, but think I'll still get dressed just to get more out of the day for myself.

[Admin]

It's Sunday



It's Sunday, and I'm still here.

I'm off for the next few days, with so so plans....and I say so so, because not sure if I'm going to do it yet, which involves a mini protest in front of a radio station that didn't call me back.

Bottom line, I'm tired of being ignored, tired of big wigs (who aren't big to me, but have positions of influence) ignoring me.

So, I'd like to return the favor, and show them what it's like to be ignored by protesting in front of their radio station, regardless of whom they send out to ask me to leave.

Of course I'd do it legally, as in on the sidewalk, public space and all.

Why?

To promote a book I've written that big wigs to snobby to help promote, yet every other segment on the radio is of someone who's already made it, promoting their own book, screw that, and the more I write this, I'm getting charged up again.

But anyways, it's Sunday, have to relieve self right now as just got up and still in bed.

[Admin]

Even though I'm off today, if I don't get dressed, I'll sloth around the place all day long.

[Admin]

It's Sunday



Wow, it's Sunday again, like groundhog day movie, round and round we go, everything is so circular.

I'm off today, worked yesterday, and well the first night I get in is pretty much useless cause mentality is still mired in the previous work shift and week.
For me it takes a good 12 hours or so, sometimes more, to totally shake the previous work day residue out of my soul, and to start feeling like myself again, free to be.

But that's only when you're single, when paired or married or ect, I think being with another or around friends will snap you out of that work mode quickly or quicker.

When have friends, you all just get together and go out somewhere for fun, go have some drinks, go to a club, the theater, whatever people do together....but when single you have no one else to whisk you off into la la land, instead all you have is self, your mind, thoughts and imagination.
-------------------------------------------

I think I'll start today be creating a 'to do list', start by getting place cleaned up. When you work long shifts, you tend to neglect cleaning up, so when finally off, place can look junky.

Then after place cleaned up to my satisfaction then I can begin be adding more fun stuff to the to do list.

Yep, it's Sunday, and I feel pretty decent, all things considered.
Let's get started

[Admin]

In a very odd place or mood right now.

I have energy, but not sure what kind.

I'm off today, off for the next few days, have plenty I can do, but just in a odd mood.

I think I'm in one of those moods where I wish I were in a relationship, and could roll over in bed and just _____ the _____ out of my partner or wife or whom and or whatever.

[Admin]

I'm going to go to the bathroom now, and get caught up on any texts or emails I may have gotten over the past 3 days.

An appropriate place to check them.

[Admin]

It's Sunday

It's Sunday, and I'm still here.

how many Suday's have I been a live for?
Hom many more shall I be alive for?

Who knows, that's up to fate.

But it's another Sunday, I'm off from work, and it's up to me to make the most of this day.

[Admin]

It's October



Also, it's October, in the past it's always been my favorite month of the year.
Hopefully that will prove true this year as well.